Penitential Rite

I confess to almighty God, and to you, my brothers and sisters, that I
have sinned through my own fault in my thoughts and in my words, in what
I have done, and in what I have failed to do;

Everyone has pieces of their childhood that hold special meaning. One of mine is a section from the Penitential Rite of the Catholic mass. I just liked that the congregation was owning up to the fact that they were all imperfect, that there was no one else to blame but themselves. Me being me, it tickled my funny own that it was intoned in the usual American Catholic monotone.

Quick aside - just about every Catholic church I've gone to is peopled by the least enthusiastic congregations when it comes to participation either by spoken word or song. We once had a French transplant who came to our school and would routinely outsing the entire student body at grade school masses. It took years, but eventually she stopped singing so loudly. Go us.

My quiet moments involve revisiting and beating myself up over mistakes that I made in the distant past. Wrong words written, thoughtless thoughts thunk, dastardly deeds done, stinging statements said, optimal options omitted [yeah - don't give me too long to write something]. My thoughts, my words, what I've done, what I've failed to do. The sole plus I can find in all this is that if I ever need to complete a 12-step program, I'll have a good start on the list of people that I've hurt and/or offended.

But at what point, should I forget this stuff and leave it behind? Do my actions from when I was in fifth grade and made fun of someone that I perceived as slightly farther down the class hierarchy impact the man that I am now? I'm sorry, Kelly. Maybe they do and that is why I keep thinking about them. It's not that all of my transgressions are that far removed from the present either.

I'm imperfect. I've sinned against others. And I have no one to blame but myself.

State of the Rock

With my birthday recently past, I've been thinking about where I am in my life. The short version is that I'm happy. In all areas of my life I am in a situation where I'm content. It's sort of a surreal state in that I don't have a lot of angst or anxiety pushing me in some direction. It's sort of a soft, chewy center of life.

My family is doing well. My wife is doing well with number two. The pregnancy has not generated any serious problems or major discomforts. At this point we are just beginning our prep work for number two's arrival. Number one is on track in most if not all areas of development. He's happy, healthy, and confident. So far the only real bane of his existance seems to be the vacuum cleaner. It's scary (don't ask me).

I have a lot of good friends in the area. I have a great time when we do get a chance to get together. I don't get to see all of them as much as I'd like, but I know that I can call on them when I need help or to celebrate. And they know that they can call on me too.

Work is going well. My job is challenging, rewarding, and located very close to my house. I like the guys that I'm working with. We are able to push each other technically and all get along really well together. I'm a valued member of my team. The company's prospects are encouraging.

I guess this is why I'm not blogging too much lately. Who wants to read this crap?

Birthday

My birthday was this past weekend. As is my custom, I invited over friends for what has become known as Thank(Rock). The house was filled to near capacity between adults and children. I think the final count was about 40 adults and 15 children. As is also my custom, I bought way too much food - to the point that I had a completely extraneous turkey when everyone was done eating. The party went well and it was good to share the day with my friends.

So... you want to run a 10K?

Over the past few weeks, I've had several people come up and ask me if I'm planning to train for a marathon again. To be honest, I hadn't been thinking about it specifically. Rather I've been lamenting the poor shape that I've slouched my way towards. So I wanted to get in shape, but I'm not specifically geared up for a marathon training. I mean I've been training for a marathon or getting fat every year for the past five years. But I'd like to support my friends in their fitness goals and really I need something that will get my burgeoning bottom off the bench and back into the game.

So as a baby step, I'm going to train for a 10K between now and the end of May. Then starting in June I'll gear up for the Lewis and Clark Marathon weekend. The advantages of targetting this weekend is that there are a number of options for someone to choose should they decide not to run the marathon due to injury or desire. They also tend not to close registration until much later in the summer than Chicago.

So if you are interested in training for a 10K, know me, and live in the Saint Louis area, let me know.