Thanks to Super Nanny, we're potty training

My wife has been saying for months that Oliver was ready to start potty training. But I hadn't really been on board with it, as I know that it takes boys longer to get potty trained than girls. When we had tried it before, he had a lot of accidents. Since I didn't want him to have too much failure, I kept saying that maybe he isn't ready.

One of my wife's guilty pleasures is Super Nanny. If you haven't seen the show, the premise is that each week, the Super Nanny shows up at a house that is an absolute train wreck, shows the parents what they've been doing wrong as parents, and fixes the problems. I think it qualifies as a guilty pleasure because these families are the ones that you gape at as they have shouting matches on the lawn or cart screaming kids through the mall. There's also big measure of relief that we aren't those parents and that those aren't our children. But every once in a while, I see myself in the parents.

One recent episode had a line where Super Nanny told the parents that something that they were doing was a safety net for their child, but also for them. With a little reflection, it came to me that diapers were functioning the same way with Oliver and I. So we just decided to go cold turkey on day time diaper wearing. He wears a pull-up for naps and bed time, but he's in underwear the rest of the time. The key is disciplining ourselves to ask him every half-hour or so and before we leave somewhere if he has to go potty and then to march him in there. Sometimes he'll just volunteer that he has to potty.

In general it is working out well. We only have one or two urine accidents a day. Poop is still a bit of a problem, but we'll take the progress we can. We've had a couple of interesting incidents like the other night when we were coming home from a friend's house and he announced about five minutes out from home that he had to potty. That made for an exciting trip. We ended up at a Starbucks a few minutes away. Not much came out, but at least he's volunteering/

I don't know if I would have decided at this point to get into the swing of things, so thanks Super Nanny.

Just a simple task

Friday night, my wife said, "I'd like for you to paint the garage this weekend. Oh, and there are a couple of rotten boards that I'd like to replace." So, in the morning, I went out to the garage and took a look. There were a few boards that had rotten spots. I got up on the ladder and took down the boards. In turns out that there were a few more rotten boards underneath them. And then underneath that one of the beams going across the front of the garage was rotten in the middle.

And so began the first of several trips to Home Depot. I picked up sheets of OSB plywood, a sixteen foot 2x4, two eight foot 2x4s, and other assorted building supplies. And what mighty machine did I cart this stuff home in? The Prius (although to be fair the sheets of plywood were cut for me and so easier transport). I will say that while the Prius is fine for lengths up to 8 feet, then sixteen foot board represented a little more of an adventure.

Then it was time to start putting everything together. It would have been nice if all of my initial measurements were correct, but there were a couple of half inch errors so I got to do some cutting of my own. Most of the pieces I was able to assemble on my own. A few of the last boards needed some shimmying in order to get in place, so I had my wife help me with that part.

When the last screw was in place, I got a second to look at what I'd done. In two days, I'd managed to more or less completely take down a side of the garage and reassemble it. While I'd be upset to pay someone for the quality of workmanship exhibited, I was pleased that I was able to get it done. Now all that remains is to caulk the seams and paint it. My wife has volunteered for that job.

One of these things is not like the others

As I was drying off the other day, I chanced to lean against a counter. I noticed it because my substantial weight was not distributed evenly across the counter. There was a bump in my groin. Usually it would be a moment of pride to look down and see a lump in my groin, but not at this time and not at this location.

First, I poked at it a bit and hoped that it would go away. When wishing didn't work, I consulted Dr. Google. Dr. Google told me that it was probably a hernia and that I would likely need surgery to fix it. Then I made an appointment with my PCP who confirmed that it was a hernia. I made an appointment with a surgeon who again confirmed that it was a hernia. So it is definitely a hernia. And I'm going to have it fixed. Color me excited. And no, not at that location again.

I'm a little anxious about the whole thing. I'm anxious about the hernia itself. I need to make sure that I don't make it bigger. So I'm trying not to lift too much ( not easy when you have a toddler). But still I'm not 100% certain what all would cause it to bulge out further. If it starts hurting (strangulating), I have to head to the hospital immediately. So when I notice it, is that the beginning of it hurting

The surgery is also making me anxious. I don't like the idea of someone cutting into my especially. I'm not crazy about the idea of sharp knives near my groin. I'm going to have to take some time off from work while we have a major effort going on. Necessary but still evil.

The other thing that gets me about the hernia is that it is an injury that I could likely have avoided if I had only stayed in shape rather than turning into the oval I am today. Joy!

On cloth diapering

In my dreams, reporters ask me all the time why it is that we use cloth diapers. I'm going to have to come up with a better reason because "My wife told me so" makes the imaginary reporters mock me. I'm not quite sure what that says about my mental health, but I'm working up a better set of answers.

We use cloth diapers because we're somewhat green. There are many levels of green. We're not quite the ultra-insulated, solar power generating homemakers like my cousin who's electric bill is usually negative. But we are the cloth diapering, Prius-driving, recycling, attempting compost folks who live in our house. I'm not certain that cloth diapering is automatically more environmentally friendly in terms of how much waste water and energy is expended in cleaning them, but I think so. Water can be cleaned and energy can come from renewables sources. I doubt that the energy here comes from renewable sources, but that is the factor that I can't control. And while we do use cloth diapers, we also use disposable diaper wipes. My wife wants to use the washable wipes, but I'm just not comfortable enough with them to go that route.

We use cloth diapers because we're cheap. Cloth diapering requires a substantial initial investment, but once the initial investment is made, the upkeep costs are minimal. Each Fuzzy Bunz/Wunderoo diaper shell costs about $10 used up to $15 new. Inserts are generally about $2-3. More traditional plastic pants and inserts can be found for less. My preference is to have enough diapers and inserts to postpone laundry day to at least every other day. So we have about 20 of each size (small/medium/large) and enough inserts to stuff them. Disposable diapers start at $9 for 48 diapers, which means that I would need to use the cloth diaper 96 times before I break even. With only one child, I would just about break even. Where I start to save money is when I either have multiple children or take the diapers that we have and pass them on to someone else. In some cases, we can even resell some of them. The investment is substantial and is a barrier to using cloth for people who do not plan to have large families or who do not have a lot of money.

Cloth diapers do have an associated upkeep cost. In order to keep the fabric inside the shells from pilling up, I need to wash them in a gentle detergent. The gentle detergent is generally more expensive, but the difference in cost per wash is small. As described before, I have to wash each load twice and dry each load twice. But the total monetary upkeep cost is still much smaller on a per unit basis than the different in cost between disposables and cloth. So cloth will still win out in the long run.

Results of a google search on the great diapering debate - Some of the results from the cloth diapering manufacturers are obviously biased, but
Comparison between cloth and disposables

See section on cloth/disposable cost comparison

We use cloth diapers because we can afford the time. What isn't factored in to my previous cost analysis is time spent laundering the diapers. Here cloth gets its butt wiped by disposables. Time represents another significant barrier to entry for cloth diapering. People who are busy, working, or a single parent do not have the same kind of time to devote to laundry that we have.

There are other barriers to entry into cloth diapering that also come up. It isn't the norm currently, so many people have simply not been exposed to it. Some of those who have been exposed to it do not want to deal with family and friends who haven't been exposed. Many day care centers are ill-equipped to deal with cloth diapering or are unwilling to take it on. Families who travel a lot are inconvienced when they have to deal with cloth diapers (we generally use disposables when travelling).

In the final analysis, we have time to spend and the money to invest. Using cloth diapers agrees with our principles especially frugality and environmental friendliness. But I recognize that other families make other decisions that work for them. I was careful in my previous post to note that with the cloth diapering resources at my disposal using disposable diapers was wasteful. I'm only incurring the waste when I forget to do the laundry.

Just like my wife told me to do.

Dootie duty

In case, anyone ever doubts it, babies spend all of their time, eating, sleeping, and pooping. As a dad, I have limited functionality to do the first, slightly more ability to help with the second, but the third is the area where I can contribute. As such, I tend to change a lot of diapers when I'm available and take care of the diaper laundry.

The diaper laundry is particularly daunting at this stage. We have two kids contributing to the diaper pail which means that rarely a day goes by without a load of diaper laundry needing to get done. If I miss two days in a row, we are generally forced to dip into our collection of disposable diapers. I don't mind using them when we are travelling, but doing it at home with the collection of cloth diapers that we have just means that I'm lazy. I guess I got spoiled when we finally got enough diapers that I could go three and four days at a stretch without needing to do laundry.

I don't think I'd mind so much if the process turned around a little quicker. As it is, the diapers require two washes (one cold, one hot) before the inserts can go into the dryer and the shells onto the line. The inserts generally take two cycles on low to get dry. The shells usually take 6-8 hours to dry on the line before they are dry enough to put on. At least some of the newborn shells will dry a little quicker. The dry time for the shells means that I'm usually doing the laundry at night before I go to bed. So I can't go to bed before that first dry cycle is completed or we won't have enough inserts for the diapers to get through another day.

I believe in what we are doing with the cloth diapers. I really do. It's honestly the only thing that can make me reach into a bucket of urine and fecal covered diapers and begin the cycle anew. I hope it is worth it.

On a bicycle built for pain

In the run up to Xavier's birth, I had been driving to work every day. But with his birth and with Oliver staying home with my wife for the summer, there is less of a need to drive. If only I could figure out some way of getting to work faster than walking...

It turns out that my wife and I have bicycles in the garage. They were POS bikes when we got them, but a bike is a bike (especially until I prove that I'll continue to do it for some time). So I took my bike into the bike shop to check the tires and to give it a tune-up. The guys who worked in the shop were rather unimpressed with my unimpressive machine, but they fixed it up well for me. A trip to REI for helmets and I was good to go.

I've been riding my bike for a week now. It isn't a long ride, but that is just fine for my out-of-shape self. Most of the uphill is on my way to work, so I always start the day feeling fresh. I hoping that in time I'll get in better shape so that the ride to work will be less of an exertion and I will consequently sweat less.

I haven't quite come to grips with my helmet. I picked the cheapest that REI had to offer. It looks like the helmet that motorcyclists that don't want to wear helmets wear. And I haven't quite come to grips with my seat. Despite the fact that it is jelly filled, it is starting to hurt my bottom as I sit. I'm not quite sure what to do in order to make it hurt less. Maybe I'll start wearing biker shorts to work under my pants. What the heck - I've already got two kids. Why would I need any more.

Me and my boys

Fleas!

A couple of weeks ago, we noticed the cat scratching. But at the time, we had more important things to worry about with the baby coming and all. So we didn't do anything. Post baby, post-baby company, we found ourselves with even more company.

My wife was the one who first noticed them. She kept getting bug bites on her ankles at night. Then she started seeing them more frequently. Finally she had enough. We were going to take care of them. The real question was how. If it were just the two of us, we'd just automatically bug bomb, stay away from the house for a few hours, and that would be the end of it. But with an infant in the house, filling the air and covering the furniture with insecticides didn't seem like the best course.

So the first round was to take all of the cloth/fabric that we had in the house and haul it down to the basement. Then I was going to spray the carpets. After a while we opened the windows and let the air circulate out any toxins. However, as my wife sat down to nurse the baby, she noticed one on his head.

Cue round two. I got out the foggers. In order to not blow up the house, I had to turn of the electricity and the pilot lights to the furnace and water heater. I crated up the cat and put him in the garage. I ended up placing six fogger cannisters in the house and setting them off. I let the house for a few hours and then opened up all of the windows and doors. An hour or so later, I let the cat back in the house. While this was going on, we sent my wife and children to live with her mother. I joined them when I was done with work. The next day I came back to check on the cat. And found still more fleas on me.

Cue round three. I bagged up all of the cloth/fabric that was now in the house. This time we called a pest removal place to come and take care of the problem. They came out, sprayed, and set three more foggers. While I was waiting, I took all of the bags to the laundromat and washed the whole thing. When I was time I came back, opened the house up, let the cat back in, and then left again. The next day we came back.

Living in the house is a bit of an adventure these days. Every time I stray wind moves some of my leg hair, I think the fleas are back. Most of our laudromat cleaning is unbagged and put away. There is still some more that needs to be done. We have seen a few fleas, but a little judicious spraying seems to have taken care of the problem. As soon as the laundry is all put away, I'll spend a couple of weeks religiously vacuuming the rugs.

And I really hope that that is all. I hope that Oliver and Xavier don't react badly to the insecticides that I picture lying on everything in the house. I hope the cat doesn't get sick. And I really hope that those stupid fleas stay gone.