Green Dress Run
Have you ever played the game "I Never"? For the uninitiated it is a drinking game where you go in a circle making statements that begin "I never ..." and if someone says something that you have in fact done, you drink. It's a good way to find out things that you didn't want to know but really actually did about your friends and acquaintances sex lives. For example, "I never kissed a girl" or "I never had sex with a cat." For the record, I would only have to drink for one of those. And up until Saturday I never had to drink for "I've never gotten dressed up in clothes of the opposite sex."
Saturday was the Green Dress Run for the Big Hump Hash House Harriers. Green Dress Run is one of the biggest events for our hash. Hashers from around the area come to St. Louis for a weekend of debauchery and running. I was going to skip the Friday pre-lube, the on-after party following the run, and Sunday's Hangover Hash, but I wanted to do the run. But having never worn any clothes of the opposite sex, I had nothing to wear.
So after Gymboree, Oliver and I went to Goodwill to go dress shopping for Daddy. We poked around looking, but I didn't see anything that would be my size. Thankfully I ran into another hasher from out of town who took pity on me and showed me a couple of options. I had a choice between something lime green with a hat or a hunter green corduroy jumper. I took the jumper for $4.50 and was on my way.
Oliver and I rolled up to the hotel just before the run was going to start. Unfortunately it was an A to B trail, meaning that while the finish was at the hotel, the start was going to be somewhere else. All of the hashers were going to get to A by piling into the back of a UHaul and getting hauled over. I thought that that was a bad idea for getting my child from here to there, so I checked with the organizers as to the location of A so that Oliver and I could drive over there in a slightly safer manner. A turned out to be the rabbit statue on Washington University's campus. Not only did I know where that was, but I was able to direct the organizers as to the best way to get there. We hung around for a bit, and then it was time to go.
When we got to the campus, we found the statue. But they had forgotten to bring the tap for the beer kegs. The first UHaul-load of hashers hung out by the statue and sang a couple of songs while waiting for the next UHaul-load to arrive (and bring the tap). They sang "Father Abraham" and a couple of other songs as our voices echoed through the campus. I can only imagine what the students who did not leave for Spring Break thought of this goofy group of green.
The goodwill was running low by the time the second load arrived. "I'm getting sober!" exclaimed one hasher. But the second group arribved with the tap. We all gathered by the statue for the Grope Shot and then retreated back down for the introductory circle and beer. Mostly for the beer. We surrounded the beer truck. The keg was tapped and the hashers were happily drinking as the hares took off. The pack milled around drinking for fifteen minutes or so before it was time to take off.
The trail started back by the statues, but it took a while to figure this out. Tricksy hares - taking off while no one was paying any attention as to where they went. The group ran past the chapel, no doubt causing a stir at the wedding inside and making for some interesting memories. The trail wound through the university and the out and into Forest Park.
The first beer stop was across the water from the art museum. The beer truck was pulled over to the side of the road and the organizers made the rounds with pitchers of beer. Always a social group, we made a point of waving to the cars as they drove by. Some enterprising hasher made up postcards that read "You've just encountered the Big Hump Green Dress Run" and had some other information about us. We handed these cards out to anyone who seemed interested in us or whom we were interested. A half-hour or so of milling about and it was time to take off again.
Trail led around and through the Muny. It seemed as if the hare was looking for any hill that he could find - almost as if he were training for a hilly run sometime soon. The second beer stop was at the World's Fair Pavilion in Forest Park. The hares did a good job arranging the trail so that the FRBs got all tangled up and the DFLs beat most of them to the beer stop.
At this point I arranged for my wife to come and get Oliver. Oliver had been having fun going around in his stroller. I let him wander around at the stops and look at all the hashers. But it was a bit cold and I thought he might be getting bored and hungry, so she came by and took him. They wandered over to the zoo for a bit.
After the beer stop, the pack took off. Trail led us to the gates of the zoo where the pack saw a "Hash Halt" marked on the pavement. But since the tricksy hares had not explained the mark in circle, the FRBs blew through it and on into the zoo. Some of the more experienced hashers obeyed the mark and waited for the rest of the pack. When most of the pack was there, the group went streaming through the gates and into the zoo. I'm positive it was a sight - dozens of people streaming through the zoo wearing green dresses. People waved and pointed. But there were not problems with security and we made it out of the zoo and to the third beer stop by the turtles.
After the beer stop the trail led more or less directly back to the hotel. A lot of the hashers ended up zenning the rest of the trail. Or at least I did. At the hotel, I turned around and ran back to A since I had just paid to do the run. But that was enough fun for one day.
Saturday was the Green Dress Run for the Big Hump Hash House Harriers. Green Dress Run is one of the biggest events for our hash. Hashers from around the area come to St. Louis for a weekend of debauchery and running. I was going to skip the Friday pre-lube, the on-after party following the run, and Sunday's Hangover Hash, but I wanted to do the run. But having never worn any clothes of the opposite sex, I had nothing to wear.
So after Gymboree, Oliver and I went to Goodwill to go dress shopping for Daddy. We poked around looking, but I didn't see anything that would be my size. Thankfully I ran into another hasher from out of town who took pity on me and showed me a couple of options. I had a choice between something lime green with a hat or a hunter green corduroy jumper. I took the jumper for $4.50 and was on my way.
Oliver and I rolled up to the hotel just before the run was going to start. Unfortunately it was an A to B trail, meaning that while the finish was at the hotel, the start was going to be somewhere else. All of the hashers were going to get to A by piling into the back of a UHaul and getting hauled over. I thought that that was a bad idea for getting my child from here to there, so I checked with the organizers as to the location of A so that Oliver and I could drive over there in a slightly safer manner. A turned out to be the rabbit statue on Washington University's campus. Not only did I know where that was, but I was able to direct the organizers as to the best way to get there. We hung around for a bit, and then it was time to go.
When we got to the campus, we found the statue. But they had forgotten to bring the tap for the beer kegs. The first UHaul-load of hashers hung out by the statue and sang a couple of songs while waiting for the next UHaul-load to arrive (and bring the tap). They sang "Father Abraham" and a couple of other songs as our voices echoed through the campus. I can only imagine what the students who did not leave for Spring Break thought of this goofy group of green.
The goodwill was running low by the time the second load arrived. "I'm getting sober!" exclaimed one hasher. But the second group arribved with the tap. We all gathered by the statue for the Grope Shot and then retreated back down for the introductory circle and beer. Mostly for the beer. We surrounded the beer truck. The keg was tapped and the hashers were happily drinking as the hares took off. The pack milled around drinking for fifteen minutes or so before it was time to take off.
The trail started back by the statues, but it took a while to figure this out. Tricksy hares - taking off while no one was paying any attention as to where they went. The group ran past the chapel, no doubt causing a stir at the wedding inside and making for some interesting memories. The trail wound through the university and the out and into Forest Park.
The first beer stop was across the water from the art museum. The beer truck was pulled over to the side of the road and the organizers made the rounds with pitchers of beer. Always a social group, we made a point of waving to the cars as they drove by. Some enterprising hasher made up postcards that read "You've just encountered the Big Hump Green Dress Run" and had some other information about us. We handed these cards out to anyone who seemed interested in us or whom we were interested. A half-hour or so of milling about and it was time to take off again.
Trail led around and through the Muny. It seemed as if the hare was looking for any hill that he could find - almost as if he were training for a hilly run sometime soon. The second beer stop was at the World's Fair Pavilion in Forest Park. The hares did a good job arranging the trail so that the FRBs got all tangled up and the DFLs beat most of them to the beer stop.
At this point I arranged for my wife to come and get Oliver. Oliver had been having fun going around in his stroller. I let him wander around at the stops and look at all the hashers. But it was a bit cold and I thought he might be getting bored and hungry, so she came by and took him. They wandered over to the zoo for a bit.
After the beer stop, the pack took off. Trail led us to the gates of the zoo where the pack saw a "Hash Halt" marked on the pavement. But since the tricksy hares had not explained the mark in circle, the FRBs blew through it and on into the zoo. Some of the more experienced hashers obeyed the mark and waited for the rest of the pack. When most of the pack was there, the group went streaming through the gates and into the zoo. I'm positive it was a sight - dozens of people streaming through the zoo wearing green dresses. People waved and pointed. But there were not problems with security and we made it out of the zoo and to the third beer stop by the turtles.
After the beer stop the trail led more or less directly back to the hotel. A lot of the hashers ended up zenning the rest of the trail. Or at least I did. At the hotel, I turned around and ran back to A since I had just paid to do the run. But that was enough fun for one day.
posted by mypetrock at 8:30 AM
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