Disturbing Situation
A couple of weeks ago I was hanging out with some friends. While we were talking, they told me that one of our mutual friends was expecting. I hadn't heard that she's gotten married or was even dating anyone seriously. When I asked, I was told that she wanted the baby and had been having unprotected sex in order to become pregnant. I'm not sure, but I don't think that her partners were aware of her plan. All concerned are waiting until the baby is born so that they can do a paternity test and figure out which of the two or three possible candidates is the father. Once paternity is determined, he'll end up paying child support.
I may come from a sheltered life, but this is probably the most irresponsible thing that I've ever heard. There are plenty of knocks to go around. On the guys to have unprotected sex with someone in the age of VD/HIV/AIDS without a condom and not in the context of a committed relationship is just plain stupid. But most men, heck even most people, enter into a casual sexual encounter with the assumption that no one wants to end up pregnant.
So everything else falls on her. See earlier comment about unprotected sex. Add on top of it that you are trying to get pregnant and withholding that information from your partner. I'm having trouble coming up with an analogy that describes how sick that is. It's bait and switch ("Instead of a night of shared passion, you picked up a life time of obligations."). It's financial theft ("Gimme your wallet. And 25% of your future earnings."). And it's emotional theft taking what should be the seminal moment in a man's life - the birth of his first child - and co-opting it for your own ends. Then toss on top of that that she will likely end up always being a single parent, and you've created a very nurturing environment for your child. Yes, some single mothers can provide a very good environment, but really from what I've described does this woman sound like that kind of woman?
It would be one thing if the condom broke. Then it becomes an accident. No one is at fault and you deal with the consequences. I'm sure that it would seem like a completely different thing if they used condoms and he poked holes in them. But here the shoe is on the other foot. She purposely provided the faulty (read: placebo) birth control and kept it up until she got what she wanted.
It's her body. But it's also his life. And the baby's life.
I may come from a sheltered life, but this is probably the most irresponsible thing that I've ever heard. There are plenty of knocks to go around. On the guys to have unprotected sex with someone in the age of VD/HIV/AIDS without a condom and not in the context of a committed relationship is just plain stupid. But most men, heck even most people, enter into a casual sexual encounter with the assumption that no one wants to end up pregnant.
So everything else falls on her. See earlier comment about unprotected sex. Add on top of it that you are trying to get pregnant and withholding that information from your partner. I'm having trouble coming up with an analogy that describes how sick that is. It's bait and switch ("Instead of a night of shared passion, you picked up a life time of obligations."). It's financial theft ("Gimme your wallet. And 25% of your future earnings."). And it's emotional theft taking what should be the seminal moment in a man's life - the birth of his first child - and co-opting it for your own ends. Then toss on top of that that she will likely end up always being a single parent, and you've created a very nurturing environment for your child. Yes, some single mothers can provide a very good environment, but really from what I've described does this woman sound like that kind of woman?
It would be one thing if the condom broke. Then it becomes an accident. No one is at fault and you deal with the consequences. I'm sure that it would seem like a completely different thing if they used condoms and he poked holes in them. But here the shoe is on the other foot. She purposely provided the faulty (read: placebo) birth control and kept it up until she got what she wanted.
It's her body. But it's also his life. And the baby's life.
posted by mypetrock at 10:25 AM
1 Comments:
that's so sick.
sadly, I don't think it's the first time I've heard of that happening.
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